An introduction, of sorts

Well, I'm going to give this another go, since today randomly I was looking at my old blog, and remembering the good times. It was quite a lot of fun and I would keep that one up, except it's messed up so I can't post on my down stairs computer, which is basically where I live, so it's very annoying.
Oh also, I'm lazy. :P
But you know... we'll see how this goes.
I haven't written a blog entry since, like, July, which is really, really crazy. Last time I wrote Joseph had just finished, and so a lot has gone on since then, including an entire show I was in (Mrs. Beaver, yo), and NaNoWriMo my third year, and... other yummies. Now it's almost a week to Christmas which is terribly exciting! We went shopping today and I spent a lot of money that I don't really have. Hehe. I got most of my presents and an early one from dad because I needed a skirt for Christmas eve since I'm singing at the mass and wanted to look nice. We got it from Kohl's and it's this nice knee length black almost silky skirt with polka dotted lace on the bottom and a cute bow. I like it. :P
Now I just have to stress about finishing all my hand made presents, (which is what I should be doing right now, heh.) I have 4 and a half of my ten cards for Grandma done, and then I have to make some for mom and some pretty ribbon-y jewelry for various peoples. Not too bad, but still... the cards take a long time. I often feel happiest when I'm doing stuff like that with my hands though, so that's good. I just listen to music, and snip, snip, snip! :D
Emily's coming home tonight, should be arriving before eight!!! I'm excited for some hang out time with her. And Leah was supposed to come home today, I don't know if she did but most likely, which means I'll actually get to SEE my friends in the coming weeks. That's always nice. We're hopefully getting out Christmas tree tomorrow (hopefully), and we're supposed to have a storm Sunday. Yay! We might actually have a white Christmas for the first time in years!!
Tonight I was procrastinating or something and randomly reading some poems about us girls Dad wrote quite awhile ago. There's this one that practically made me cry, because it's about me. There are actually quite a few about me, hehe. I feel special. :P

Twist Bridge

Anna has a different kind of mind,
she sometimes struggles where her sister's soar,
beginning reading lessons, first letters,
foundation twinkles on the piano,
they don't come easy to her.
she works, and its determination,
more than anything,
that gets her through.

Yet, on the boardwalk,
(the "twisty bridge" the girls call it)
in through the woods to Saco Heath,
where we admired, in May, the fiddle heads,
silver green, tightly curled, delicate at fronds' end,
and I asked, "why do you think they call them
it is Anna who sees and says
the curl in the head of the violin
and laughs with delight to have discovered it.

It is Anna who reaches back a book in the Narnia series
to guess it is the old professor behind the magician's door...
wrong, as it happens,
an inspired guess none the less,
a leap, with its own logic,
something about the similarity of the setting, the houses, the many doors?
the idea of knowledge as magic?
the suspicion that the professor knows Narnia too well?
some subtle clue in the wording or the working of the story
(he crossed my own mind not a moment before).

There is something indirect as the boardwalk, a twisty bridge, in Anna's mind,
coiled tight as the fiddlehead, dusted silver, opening to filigreed fronds of wonder,
some connection between knowledge and magic,
some subtle working beyond determination to discovery's laugh,
a different kind of mind...

and I want to say,
good for you Anna!
Hang on to that difference,
it will take you places
determination never will.

The thing is, I've struggled a lot with that (he didn't make it up ;)). With feeling more stupid then my sisters because I couldn't do things as good or whatever, and I always remembered that poem kind of as a confermation of that feeling, that I WAS different. But I didn't remember the end of it at all. And it makes me happy. :)

Oh, and this one's always been one of my favorites, it's so... me. Still, at 15 going on 16!

Anna At Eight

Anna at eight

(today, hurray)

looks out from the safe place

she has made behind her face,

and I wonder, sometimes, what's going on in there

behind the lid of her look,

what's stirring behind her stillness?

I suspect, like a deep night sky,

hidden behind clouds,

there are stars and constellations, nebula, and globular clusters

and whole galaxies

growing, glowing, burning bright back there.

I am always surprised when a smile

falls like a comet,

and her eyes come fully alive, alight,

and she says something so full of insight

that it washes over me in sparks of delight.

And I want to say,

"Oh, here's Anna,

come back from wherever she lives

for another visit.

How nice to see you again!"

And it always is.

Anna at eight.

Already a master of the feminine mystique.

I like to think I visit a little more often then I did then, but hey, master of the feminine mystique! ...oh yes. :P